Reading OG’s and Vimmu’s post on switcheroo and sex changes and chatting with Badz about it , just reminded me of how much men freak out when asked about other men 🙂
Have you noticed how, when a woman passes by, both men and women look at her ? Men check out her attributes 🙂 and women check out her clothes and accessories 🙂 I remember, once when Husband and I were walking down a street and were passed by 2 girls – both of whom apparently checked me out – much to the consternation of my husband 🙂 He could not figure out, why ,on earth, do women check out other women , when men will be scandalised when asked about another man? I do think that he was more offended that he was ignored – how could they ignore him ???
Look at how easily women( Solilo, Mandira, Monika,..) have blogged about women they could like – if they were men 🙂 And look at the men! they need to talk about sex change operations to be able to talk about other men 🙂 Not that I am complaining – I am having a ball of a time reading all you crazy guys – but seriously – why?
Well, when I look at women, I look at their clothes, accessories 🙂 – more from a purely fashion point of view 🙂 I don’t see many men doing that, do you? And I don’t for a minute feel ashamed of it either 🙂 I am sure many men would die before admitting to it!
So is it something in their ‘mental makeup’ or is it social conditioning? Is it because it is not considered ‘manly’ enough? I remember, when we were younger boys used to hang out with their hands around each others shoulders.. As we grew up and got more worldly – that was a complete ‘no no’! We were told that in an orientation class when we first started work.. Men were warned to resist from holding hands and walking around with their hands on each others shoulders especially when abroad 🙂
So have the men’s inhibitions been growing as the women get more adventurous ? Or are we now social conditioned not just by Indian standards but also by Western standards? Come on , you guys, please tell me – I really want to know!!
Edited to add:
Me first. 😀
Ya – how could you not be 😉
Some cheating going on 😉
absolutely ! 🙂
Where have you been? Exhausted after all the partying yesterday ?
We learnt from the master – the great Hitchwriter!
beeeen submerged in work !!!!! boss is back in town and he is for another 2 days.. so i’ll be working a lil more sincerely !!!!
😆 oh oh so you are going to be busy for the next 2 days 😦
LoL! I totally agree with you that women find can admire and compliment other women whereas men cannot. And if they do, the are considered to be gay. I guess it’s to do with the norms of society and what is acceptable and what is not.
Yes, I agree.. It is definitely due to what is deemed ‘acceptable’ by society.. And this thing about being considered ‘gay’ – sad, isn’t it – that it has such a negative connotation to it..
I mean women are “allowed” to greet each other with hugs and sometimes kisses on cheeks. Whereas men only have contact with each other but shaking hands.
Yes, men having physical contact with each other is limited to the Football field 🙂
BUT honestly speaking, I think this should change. I think men should be allowed to greet each other with hug (more in the west because some do in the east) and not be considered as being “homosexual.”
I also believe men should be allowed to compliment each other more openly.
I think it is changing – though slowly 🙂 I think the metrosexual is more open.. though they are judged by society – look at poor SRK 😦
Poor SRK. He is GAY for crying out loud !!!! 😀
Vimmuuu!!! How can you call SRK that!!! He is so not GAY!! He is the nicest man around !
Typo…Nicent EUNACH around ! 😀
oops, nicest EUNUCH around ! (in the excitement, you see 😀 )
Vimmuuu ! 👿
hee heee…. i concur with vimmuuu
Hitchy – You too!!!! How could you do this!!!!!!
hahahahahahahahhahahahaahhaa, vimmuuu has a valid point!!!!
OG – You too???? I did not expect this from you!
u run before IHM and solilo see this
BTW People… SMi, is also cheating …. she is cleverly not doing the tag and deflecting it…..!!!!!!!!!
Well – I haven’t been tagged 🙂 Yay! So the question of deflecting it does not arise 😆
I tag you on behalf of Sol’s Darl…. and Monu !!! come on … lets see what you make us droool on !!!!!!! 😀
You can’t tag me! Only people who have done the tag properly can tag me! If you tag me – I will be forced to do it the way – you did 🙂 By listing yummy men 🙂
even I dont like SRK’s acting skills but this is blasphemy! 😆
Yes yes – it is blasphemy indeed!!!!
SRK is so NOT gay 😛 😛
Smitha I am going to tag you gurl 😀
consider yourself tagged ! 🙂
What Abhi – why are you ganging up on me with Hitchy!!!!!! I was happy not to be tagged. 🙂 Now these guys get a chance to get back at me 😦 sob sob!
After all Indi is my “di !!!! 😀
Yes -you guys are ganging up against me 😦
Men consider looking at another guy as gay but pulling down another player’s shorts on a rugby field or slapping arses on a cricket field not gay…I don’t understand this…Men are weird!
Bones, That I totally agree with!!! Can’t ever figure that out!!!
Sraboney that was such a good point!! 😀
Answer this guys! 😛
See, they have totally ignored that question! Clever aren’t they 🙂 May be we should make up a tag with all such tough questions and tag all these guys 🙂 What say, Abhi?
To be frank , when ever i come across a gal worth looking,i will check out her smile and eyes 😛 …… and at U’r question , why men can’t compliment other men.Because our social atmosphere brought us up in that way. .But I guess situations are changing among our generation now a days.We used compliment each other about our hair style ,looks,accessories,so called ‘six packs ‘ etc.and also we used discuss about Katrina kaif and at the same time we admire john Abraham’s style sense also 😛 …hope i didn’t confuse U?
Anish – I have no doubts that you guys would all check out the women 🙂 So you guys are all metrosexual, are you 🙂 Good going 🙂
@ I don’t see many me…when ever i plan to buy something for my sister,i used to check out the fashion,accessories of many girls from roadside,office,shopping malls to my church 😛 , But rest of the time i’m least bothered abt that 🙂 ……..
You do? I am impressed!!! Wow! Even in church! Now thats naughty 🙂
yeah going gud 🙂 .
I feel, before i was not a nice brother,So i’m trying to compensate that now a days 🙂 .
@ church….I’m not ashamed of that lol 🙂 …nyways i used ogle 😛 at them only after service (mass)only 🙂 …so guess no probs ..After all i guess, those places are the best place to get nice friends 😛 .
😆 So its okay if its ‘after service’ :lol:!!! Make sure your church folks don’t get to hear of this 🙂
Hahahha :)…hmm well as far as my intention is gud…guess they don’t have any issue in that ..lol 😛 ……
😆 Ya, ya, good intentions 🙂
Thats because we dont care about the package! We are worried only about the content 😀
Ya, Ya, we sure know all about that 🙂
Jokes apart, for me to have a fascination for a girl, she has to have a nice smile, a good attitude and a wonderful sense of humor. That rules out in me the normal tendency of guys to admire some-random-girl-on-the-street. I am not being decent here, Im being honest. The girl and I need to speak, for me to actually look at her.
Ok, that is different 🙂 I have not heard that from many men 🙂 Or are you pretending to be a nice boy – now that you are in the marriage market 😉
LOL, one shouldnt be honest or what ???? 😀
Ok, Ok I believe you 🙂
east or west
females are the best !
See – Thats what I like to hear 🙂
How true…Though here in the Muslim countries, men greet each other by touching cheeks and sometimes with their noses…it looks yukky! See, even I have the prejudice, so it is all the social set up I guess!But on the other hand, there are a lot of gays too here though everything is behind curtains nothing in the open as it is still taboo in Islam!
Yes, Sindhu, we certainly seem to be prejudiced 😦 And sure there must be a lot of gays – underground…thanks to the social conditions..
Great smitha,ur header is awesome,do one for me.
now let me go and read the post 🙂
Sure Saritha – Will do 🙂 Am so happy that you liked it 🙂
I noticed this too Smitha, men seem to have more of such pressure than women do.
We can wear our heart on our sleeve and get away with it:) men can’t!
I noticed this too Smitha, men seem to have more of such pressures than women do.
Well said smitha.If men hug men our society calls him SRK 😉 (i hope no one is behind me with a stick).
I know ! What to do – no wonder the men are scared! So sad na – being called SRK is considered to be an insult!
In arab countries men and women greet each other by shaking hands and by touching cheeks as if they are kissing.I saw a m-law doing to her s-inlaw.I was shocked,in our society i dont think any m-law dares to give handshake to her s-inlaw.
Yes, the customs are so different, aren’t they? Something that is so integral to them is shocking to us !
seriously, I make it a point never to hold hands with guys….. 😛 LOL…. or check out guys…. well the truth is that I have been brought up that way…. 😛 and I hate it if somebody teases me about it as well 😛 (read this certain bloggers) 😛 😛
😆 Dhamkis also? OG is changing! or was it Solilo’s machine’s work?
but yeah, in india,we do walk around with arms on shoulders……
never in america 😛
😆 We were actually told this in orientation 🙂
I would not have much idea about women checking out women….. 😛 😛 😛
so cannot comment on that
Ya, Ya, I believe you too!! After all you lost points in your driving test coz you did not ‘scan the road’ enough 😆
Women checking out on other women. Hmmm… where have I heard that before??? Oh yes, Solilo, Indyeah and their renowned Dostani !! 😀
We women do not need the excuse of ‘dostana’ to check each other out!!! We are quite ok with it 🙂 Atleast I am 🙂 How else will I know how not to buy that latest skirt from next coz every second person has it?
LOL!!!!!! aliya vimmuuu, dont tease them too much, otherwise they will gang up and make fun of you till you get tired of it….
The evil axis of woman power…….. 😛 😛 😛
😆 Atleast there is one nice kid who accepts the ‘evil axis of woman power’ 😉 After all we do outnumber you in our blog samaj 🙂 We can get all our leaders and generals in place in minutes 🙂
Dhiren you asked for it!
get ready to have some fun(at your expense) 😆
what did i ask for ?????????
I think she meant OG not Dhiren 🙂
wah!!that IS a great point Smithus GEneral 😀
we outnumber them here!
Yes, sure we do 🙂 And we sure take full advantage of that 🙂
LOL!!!!no Mam, in that regards, I am always in scanning mode 😛 😛 😛
eyes never seem to tire…..
ha ha ! The truth at last 🙂 ‘always in scanning mode’ – now that I can believe 🙂
always in scanning mode?
what were you doing checking out Vadivelu and others ? 😆
PS:- but seriously before any brickbats come my way 😀 you guys (Vimmuu,you and Dhiren) did an awesome job with your tags too
I have not laughed so much in ages 😀
hmm…I usually notice what my friends wear but we guys are more of gadget freaks mobiles , cams etc ….any way guys too scan/notice coz when ever I wear sleeveless they keep commenting on me showing my arms and arm pits etc …
Is it? I am yet to come across men like that 🙂 Guess the younger men are more ‘metrosexual’ 🙂
And i did read in a book on evolution that both men and women look/scan/notice women and that is the reason why female models are used..
Yes, Have read that too .. And makes sense too..
Among men even today it is about power , popularity etc but among women it is more about being the most attractive..
Well, I do think that women think about power too.. Not just about being attractive.. And looking attractive can also be enpowering.
So basically that is the way we are ..and it is not that guys don’t hold hands , we do when we arm wrestle …
😆 Yes, arm wrestling indeed!! 😆
i did the tag too !
Coming over right away!
oh fun post smitha
but tell me what fashion will men look at each other for? i mean ok may be a nice shirt but there too the choice is so little
I know!! So true! Poor guys, can’t blame them I guess, what can they look at 😆
when we females look at other females like u said have so much to notice right from the hair to the shoes…. clothes, jewelery, shoes, makeup
Absolutely 🙂 Now I feel sorry for these guys – they know not what they are missing 🙂
Did you see my Switcheroo post ? 🙂
I missed it – coming there right away 🙂
Have to say – you are the only guy who has done the tag properly – unlike those three 🙂
Oh god… no recognition for the creativity here… this is discrimination Smitha… LOL 😆
😆 – No No – these guys are extremely creative 🙂 No question about that 🙂 Too creative sometimes I would say 🙂
*pats Kislay’s back proudly*
Nice post Smitha! I enjoyed reading it and the comments too! I agree with you 100%!
Where are the others, Indyeah and solilo to make it more interesting….!
The comments are such fun, aren’t they 🙂 Waiting for them 🙂 They are probably busy 🙂
A laughable post Smitha… 🙂 anyway what the guys have to see at other guy… anything?
That is also true 🙂 Poor you guys 🙂
Smitha I agree completely with your views 🙂
I have seen that it is extremely uncomfortable for guys to show their affection for even their own brothers/father/friends or any other man in their life..
Yes, it is so much a part of their personalities, isn’t it? Men don’t cry, they don’t show emotions.. They are almost being discriminated with all these expectations that are foisted on them..
Physical affection which would include hugging or holding hands is taboo to them…and so is saying anything remotely affectionate….
to be absolutely honest this is how they have been..and I think it is a mindset that will take a lot of time to change…
and even the most liberal guys have trouble doing all the things you mentioned(which I also agree with)
Yes, it will take time.. but I do hope things change.. I am sure it will be nicer for everybody that way:)
toh this whole crush list is totally beyond them 😀
and yes they do resort to humour to make their points 😀
(which you noticed so brilliantly)
I know – they did so very brilliantly, didn’t they 🙂
Also fellas…. Kislay is the ONLY one who has done this very seriously and very nicely 😛 😛
Kislay is the only one who played fair 🙂 BIG cheer for Kislay 🙂
@Vimmuu,OG,Dhiren :-Which is not to say that yours was not good..it was brillaint in its humour but not the original switcheroo at all 😛
Yes, yes I agree! Vimmuuu, OG, Dhiren – yours were great! Where we have gone for such wonderful humour – if it had not been for you guys!! Even if you did make fun of SRK!
what is this……… 😦 😦 😦 😦
this is not fair….. the guys on my list were the most smart, handsomest guys you will find in entire india……
I did a serious tag and people do not believe me hehehehehehehehe 😛
That was a serious tag 🙂 😆
beauty is in the eye of the beholder!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 😛
That I have to agree with 🙂 If those guys are what you find attractive 🙂
good one Smitha! 😀
Please kill me if I ever find them the ‘best’ in entire India 😆
Dont try emosionaal blackmail OG 😛 😛
acha okay 😛 yours was brilliant! 😀
what emotional blackmail……. 😛 “OG looks innocent*
😛 ok madam, do you think I should continue the tale to finish the epic battle????????
yep!you should! 😀
okay done!!!! wait for my next decent post….. with 5 hot guys in it 😛 😛
See, I am also comfortable doing such tags 😛 😛
Oh great!! Waiting for some eye candy 🙂
Smitha your header is BEAUTIFUL!!! 🙂
Thank you 🙂 Got bored of the old one.. I wanted to do something more creative – then decided to go with this for now 🙂 Until such time that I can experiment more 🙂
having said what you said ..men have a camaraderie, but women seldom do .. i am talking about places of work. they back each other up when times are tough but what percentage of women would display this behavior —
Anrosh, That is true as well… When times are tough they certainly back each other up… Does it have to do with the fact that in most work places men outnumber women? Do you think it would be better where women are more in number? Do you think that would make a difference?
There’s this theory one of my male friends told me:
“All women are supposedly born bi-sexual.” And society is conditioned that way too. Wait, wait… let me explain!!!
It doesn’t mean I want to jump into bed with the next attractive woman I see…
What he meant was, women showing affection to women or checking them out is supposedly an inherent tendency… and is actually considered normal… as opposed to men doing the same with men. Think about it. Makes sense in a twisted way, doesn it? Especially after reading the post and the related comments here… I’m definitely starting to understand the sentiment behind it! 😛
You know what, Ashwathy, I think your friend has analysed it very well! It makes so much sense!!
and you were sad that you werent tagged, right. I hereby officially tag you. Check out the final part :
I don’t recall being sad at all, actually 🙂
Heading over right away 🙂
Men are insecure unlike us women. We have no problem letting our emotion and talking about our girlfriends. Men are scared to get branded as gays. They have a phobia. 😀
Oh yes, Sols, They are absolutely paranoid! They do have a phobia 🙂
Whoever says anything about SRK is going straight to Timbaktu. 😡
Ob absolutely 🙂
Timbaktu??? Is that where SRK becomes gay and happy ??? 😀
I can’t believe I’m so late in commenting here as well 😦
Oh you are very busy, aren’t you? No friday evening post either – I love your friday evening posts 🙂
Thank you 🙂
The post, I agree with what you say! and no comments on the whole SRK arguments!!! 😛 😛
😆 Pixie is being very diplomatic here 🙂
As in, you agree, right ??? C’mon, its time we accepted the fact and stopped worrying about losing friendship with SRK ‘lovers’ !!! 😀
Hey Vimmuuu – Stop instigating people!!! And stop campaigning against SRK ! You could be sued 🙂
ok, me no SRK fan as such… 😛
But, I do admire his business acumen! and I enjoy some of his movies like…
*walks out to the room trying to come up with a movie name!*
I don’t think he is great actor – I just find him cute 🙂 And yes, I think he has got a very sharp mind!
Been busy with work 😦
Can’t believe I let myself get overloaded so badly!
I used to do that too! All the time.. I never had a day on bench or in an easy project, you know 🙂
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Congratulations! Your post has been selected by BlogAdda as one of the top posts for this week’s ‘Spicy Saturday Picks’.
Do mail me so that we can send you something to add to your Awards list 🙂
Oh Thank you so much!! I am absolutely flattered to say the least 🙂
Thanks Pixie!! I am so so happy 🙂
Congrats smitha 🙂
they recognise genius! 😀
Genius 🙂 I would think – that is taking it a bit too far 🙂
All of the generals here are geniuses 😉
😆 That is totally true 🙂
Congrats!! Blogadda coming our blog samaj way yet again!!! yay!!
Thanks Winnie!!!!! – I noticed it first thing this morning and have been up in the clouds since 🙂
P.S: I have noticed that guys have a hard time accepting “gays” .. yesterday for a conversation… I asked my friend to name 5 guys and you know what ? he was like I can never ever think about guys.. am secure in my manhood to swing.. I was like what the heck! We end up arguing bitterly 😛 😛
I know!! It happens all the time! I think they are too insecure to be able to even think of other guys 🙂 And it is also the negative connotations that society associates with 2 guys being close.. you know. Not the macho kind of close – but the touchy feely kind 🙂 – which is totally accepted for women 🙂
Anyhow.. he is not the first guy that way!! must be psychology! Men are programmed to fight over other men and prove that they are “alpha” so there always is competition.. but females never had this issue.. they got the right to pick n choose ( ideally ofcourse!!!) so they dont mind appreciating other females..
Oh it is so so common! Yes, I can even look appreciatively at a girl and say – oh she has a figure I could die for! Ask a man and he’ll go crazy 🙂
Or may be.. like freud says (or someone else) Male assert their maleness as “not female” .. we girls have it easy .. we never go through the “gender identity” phase.. so well pick your choice!
Yes, we never assert out ‘femaleness’ do we? Funny that! And again ‘maleness’ has ‘strength’ associated with it and being a ‘female’ has ‘weakness’ associated with it , at least traditionally, doesn’t it?
You knw,Smitha,here in the middle east men do greet each other by hugging and a peck at each other’s cheeks!
Funny, no, how customs are so diverse.. And something that is so ingrained in them – is so difficult to accept for us 🙂
Great to see you back Deeps!!!! Been missing you!
not only i enjoyed your post, but the comments too… and i agree with vimal!! :twisted”
Welcome here, Sakhi! I love your short stories.. Havenot been able to read your last two yet 🙂 The comments are far better a lot more fun than my post 🙂
btw, i stumbled here though his blog 🙂
I have Vimal to be thankful to, then, I guess 🙂
i did the tag in proper style now.. and tag you !
*sob sob* I should have just laid low and not said anything 😦
I thought it was elementary. Men check out women for obvious reasons and women check out other women as competitors dressing up to attract males! Does that sound sexist? I thought that is basis of the whole fashion business etc.
Well, a little sexist 🙂 We don’t dress up to attract men, you know 🙂 We dress up coz we enjoy it 🙂 And as we seem to have established, women notice what other women wear – far more than any man could 🙂
Came here thru blogaddas spicy picks.Enjoyed the post as well as the comments.
Welcome here, Sree 🙂
I think, even if some men in their boyish days be touchy n emotional with their boy friends,they tend to work hard to get out of such display as they grow older,matured.I also think,the need to be held,hugged etc is less in men than in women.hmm.I’m gonna think and observe more on this subject 🙂
You are right.. I think they are ‘trained’ to not show emotions, be ‘strong’ and everything else associated with being ‘manly’! So they out grow out of being demonstrative as they grow older..
though I have said it I will say it again!CONGRATULATIONS on being selected for Blogadda!!!! 😀
Thank you so much!! I do think there you guys have so many posts so much better than this one! I just don’t deserve it as much ! But yes, it still makes me very happy 🙂 materialistic me 🙂
Congrats on making it to the Spicy Saturday Picks! Very interesting post. 🙂 I must say men hugging is not frowned upon that much in India. Look at all the hugging they do at the drop of a hat in the movies. Really too much of yaraana and dosti and there they go hug hug hug…!!! Lol. sometimes makes me wonder!! Hehehe…
Oh yeah – that is true 🙂 But only in the movies I guess 🙂
And this is something that I have pointed out to my husband years back, men look at women and women also are more interested in checking out women, what they are wearing, how they look etc. Poor men, nobody really ogles at them except in the Axe ad and those hair gel ads!! 😛 And if you try telling your partner about some guy you have checked out, his looks or the suit he is wearing, all you get in reply would be either a stony silence or a bewildered look. Talk about insecurity! :-))))) 😛
A lone Venusian living in a Martian household.
😆 ‘A lone Venusian living in a Martian household.’ – that was PRICELESS!!! loved that 🙂
‘ Poor men, nobody really ogles at them except in the Axe ad and those hair gel ads!!’ – So true 🙂 Poor guys 🙂 No wonder they are this insecure 🙂
Oh I check out women all right. And women have checked me out. It is a women thing. Men will not check out other men till their manhood is threatened or by some fancy gadget the dude is carrying.
Fun Post and you have some really funny blogworld friends.
lol!! I totally agree – ‘their manhood is threatened or by some fancy gadget the dude is carrying’ 🙂
And yes, I do have some really funny blogworld friends 🙂 Thats the reason I love blogging so much 🙂
When I first read this tag on Solilo’s blog, I knew that no guy will take it up. It was impossible. We have this social conditioning. Its difficult for guys. 🙂
Amit, the guys did do it 🙂 Did you not see Vimmuuu’s and OG’s posts 🙂 They finally did do it:) Really fun posts
Good one Smitha.
Have been late in reading all these posts of yours. what you wrote is completely true. Going through the comments section was more fun..
Yes, the comments are so much more fun, aren’t they?
BTW..ur new header looks too good
“Your post has been selected by BlogAdda as one of the top posts for this week’s ‘Spicy Saturday Picks’.Congratulations Smitha..
Thanks Mystery 🙂
“when we were younger boys used to hang out with their hands around each others shoulders..”
U knw I’ve thought abt this in the same way many time….I do feel sad for tht loss of innocence.
Yes, me too..
Congrats on making it to Blog Adda SSP’s 😀
Thank you so much Nancy 🙂
I can walk holding my sis’s hand, but I would definitely have a problem if hubby did so with his bro (not that either ever would…..they’re too “macho” for that :D). I can’t explain this, its just something in how we’re conditioned.
Exactly! I think they must have held hands when they were younger, but slowly it became inappropriate..
And yes, I too check out other women when I’m out…..there’s a constant commentary going on in my head, snap judgements on attire, accessories and the overall effect…..its a girl thing 😀
Oh me too 🙂
Read all the comments and you truly deserve to be at BlogAdda’s Spicy Saturdays. “So have the men’s inhibitions been growing as the women get more adventurous ? Or are we now social conditioned not just by Indian standards but also by Western standards?”. This question needed to be answered and glad that you are getting the answers 🙂 .
Thank you , Harish 🙂
@winnie Jab tak aap zabardast post likhte rahenge, hum aapke samaj main aate rahenge 🙂 Dhanyawaad .
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He he can’t believe I ws nt reading u then 😉 What an observation Smithu! Loved reading the post and the comments 🙂
Incredible points. Great arguments. Keep up the good