The joys of solitude.. Post 14

I am a social person, most of the time, but there are times, when I need to/love to be alone.

Times when I enjoy being alone, when I enjoy my own company. Who am I kidding, I think I can enjoy my own company any time.

Some of my friends tell me how they find it difficult to walk alone. For me, for some reason, walking alone is fun. I think I also get a lot of ideas on what to post next, when I walk alone. And I get to walk at my pace. I walk very fast(very unladylike, according to some, not that it bothers me), so if I walk with someone else, I end up having to walk slow, which to me is a waste of time. I know, I sound so selfish. But since I walk to keep fit, I feel happier if I spend 30 mins walking 3 miles rather than 1.5 hours walking 2 miles, you know. Being alone gives me the flexibility to do it my way.

I was talking to someone on the phone once, and mentioned that daughter was in bed, and husband had a work get-together. She asked me if I did not feel lonely. The thought had not occurred to me. It was me-time, and I love having me time. I like the fact that I have time to just to myself, to read, blog, or do whatever pleases me. And can keep myself entertained.

There are times when I refuse dinner get-together invites from my girlfriends when the husbands have a work get-together. I refuse some of them just because I need that me-time. That space of my own. That time where I am alone with my thoughts, and enjoy it. I can’t understand why being alone is automatically called being ‘lonely’. I sometimes wonder if our hobbies can indicate what sort of person we are. I love reading, which is mainly a ‘single person’ activity, so I can’t help wonder if people like me who like being alone, also have hobbies and interests which might not always be extremely social?

In fact, to me, if I can’t relate to a bunch of people in a social gathering, I am far more likely to feel lonely even in the midst of people, than when I am alone at home. I like being ‘home alone’, I like having my space, and I like my own company.

I have friends who have friends over at their place almost every day. While I do like having friends over or meeting up with friends, but after a point, it gets too much for me. I need to detox πŸ™‚ And I can’t do it everyday.

How about you? What kind of social animal are you? Do you like being alone or does it amount to loneliness?


23 thoughts on “The joys of solitude.. Post 14

    • Yayyyyy…
      I am well how do I put a crowd man.. I love going out with friends and having a good time. Alone I feel lonely dont like to out alone anywhere.

      I can even go out alone πŸ™‚ Totally your opposite, I guess πŸ™‚

      Having friends at home all the time no not my cup of tea. I also dont like going to someones house all the time.
      He he he I know cant make up my mind to be alone or not.

      πŸ™‚ Guess all of us have our own boundaries πŸ™‚

  1. Oh I luvvv walking alone too, and I am fast at it too! Cn so relate to what u r saying there πŸ™‚

    And I totally love my ‘me-time’, as much as I luv spending time with loved ones πŸ™‚

    Cud so be me writing this post Smithu πŸ™‚

  2. I love being alone sometimes. It helps me spend time with me and myself. I say that at the cost of sounding self-obsessed, but getting that one hour of me-time is very important to me. That’s when i can sit down and gather my thoughts, or do what i enjoy most. or well, just get some peace.

    That’s exactly how it is for me too πŸ™‚ Welcome here, vanillasense.

    Solitude is an important part of my life, but this doesnt mean i am lonely.


  3. I think it’s only when we’re comfortable with solitude that we can evaluate whether our relationships with people actually enrich our lives. I’ve known plenty of people who just needed to have a large circle of friends only so they always had someone to hang around with.

    I agree! I feel the same way. I have known such people too.

    I’ve lived with family, roommates, boyfriend, spouse, and by myself. And I can safely say that the time I lived by myself was the most fun. I could choose to go out and meet friends, or I could choose to be by myself. I didn’t have that kind of choice when I was living with someone.

    ‘And I can safely say that the time I lived by myself was the most fun.’- I have had a lot of fun living alone too! Even now, I enjoy it when I can be alone at home! I would prefer the expense of renting a place just for myself rather than have room mates, just because it gave me the flexibility to choose whether or not I wanted company.

  4. OH!!I totally understand..I still remember how one of my relatives freaked out when I said that I love to be alone at times.. And exactly the reason why I am here at home today when husband is at Saudi on a business trip.. For me being alone spending time with myself, a pleasure trip with myself and I do enjoy it..and yes to some extend I love to be with people, but I need some space for myself…And am happy there are people like me cos till now people thought I sounded crazy and craving for loneliness

  5. I love to have people around, Smits! I’m a social animal in true sense of the word. Yes I can understand sometime you do feel the need to be with yourself, in solitude. I love that me time too, but not for long. After a point it kind of begins to get to me πŸ˜€

    BTW same pinch on walking fast! I used to be bullied in school for this precise habit you knwo πŸ˜€

  6. I am wondering if being into blogworld is an indication of being like you mention here. I can very well relate to you Smitha… I find myself observing and thinking and talking to myself in my mind… read stuff and try to read minds, faces, behaviors etc.. I am happy to be left alone provided there is pen, paper, something to read or lets just say internet connection and I am not even including chatting on virtual forums…

    & while i am a brisk walker, when I am walking alone in mornings in the lovely surroundings, i like to slow down, hear the birds, notice them and sometimes take pictures too..

  7. I can very well relate to it.I love my me-time and will take it any day over get together or outings. I just love to be with myself, my books, music and the nature.

  8. I consider myself a social person too, but I need my “me time” at least once in a while, I try to stay back at home and send R and Chucky out of home. It perks my mood when ever I get some time of my own.

  9. I luv my me time and need it almost everyday….Lonely…I never feel that way…Infact when I m alone..there are so many things which i cn do like reading/blogging/commenting..
    Infact when i dont get this lonely time..i get pissed off πŸ™‚

  10. I crave for some me time. Since my in laws are now staying with us the Me time is almost nil and I somtimes feel suffocated.

    I can imagine. Everytime I come back after a holiday in India, I actually enjoy the peace and quiet.

    I feel the time that I spend with myself clears my thought & gives me peace πŸ™‚
    Same here!

  11. I’ am not at all a social person…. I love to spend most of my time alone…. Me time is the most precious for me and that’s where weekends come into picture… πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  12. As much as I love people…. !!! I so many times dream I am on a journey all alone to ladakh… travelling in local buses with locals and staying in homestays and befriending new people et all… !!!!

    That sounds like so much fun! I would love to do all that too!


    Sigh 2

  13. Solitude is the time, when we appreciate having frnds and ppl around us…its a must for every person….
    I too need my me-times, to keep up with other pressures….as u said, walk time is the time, I sort out my thots – so, I prefer not to talk with anyone.

  14. I can so totttaaaaalllly relate to this article πŸ™‚
    Me-time plus long solitary walks! I love them.. just like you πŸ™‚

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