or so he claims when he says ‘“Swayamvar nahin Raam Shaadi bolo, jab thaan hi li hai to shaadi karke hi jaaoonga.”
Ever since I first saw Rahul Mahajan ki shaadi promos, I have been at a loss to figure out, who in the right mind would want to marry him?
Well, we found out. There were plenty and most of them from media/acting backgrounds. Not really surprising, is it? I am willing to bet that most of them must be hoping that they stay on long enough for the audience and headhunters to notice them and then would have luck of getting rejected by the man:) That would surely be having the cake and eating it too, wouldn’t it?
The thing with all these reality shows is that you get hooked! I started watching it, to just see who would want to marry him and I am so hooked! They are such a laugh riot. Of course, I would be grateful if Rahul Mahajan’s laughter could be sedited out or even beeped out! He does sound exactly how Smita describes . The stuff the girls came up with was just hilarious! One girl claims that ever since she saw Dil toh Pagal hai – she was convinced that she would get married to a ‘Rahul’!! Another one, has been pining away for him for that 10 years – ever since she saw him, when she was 14. Thats right – 14 years of age! That must be the longest crush ever! Some are already in love with him. One claims that he is perfect – apparently he is a responsible person – now where could she have possible got that from? And honest because she says he wants to go good for the nation if he ever enters politics! Yes, right! Show me one politician who says he wants to do ‘bad’ for the nation. That’s all we need, for him to enter politics as well. As if we did not have enough ‘interesting’ people in politics already! One of the girls was a Iskcon devotee, but she was chucked out. Guess they did not like the fact that she spoke more about Krishna than Rahul 
Apparently every girl dreams of getting married to a celebrity – really? I must be living in some kind of parallel universe as I am yet to meet a girl with these ‘dreams’.
Yesterday, we got to know some interesting general knowledge facts, like Obama’s real name is Obama Bin Laden!! and another contestant had a tough time figuring out which country Nagaland belonged to – Columbo(????) and South Africa being one of the names that she tried with! It was hilarious! She was given so many hints and yet could not figure it out. It amazes me that people who know(and love) Rahul Mahajan have no clue that Nagaland is part of India! Is it just a sign of the times? I must be out of touch because I still haven’t been able to figure out what exactly is so great about Rahul Mahajan? I though people would run the other way, if asked to marry him. Apparently I am very very wrong.
When I had first seen Big Brother here – the time when Shilpa Shetty had participated, I was surprised to see how easily celebrity-dom is cast on so many people. It does not seem very different in India. People seem to be becoming ‘celebrities’ based on all sorts of claims to fame. One of the contestant claimed that her mother gave her the money that she had been saving for her gall bladder operation, to her daughter so that she could participate here. What? Competing in a reality show is more important than an operation? What kind of child would accept it? Wouldn’t that be a fair indication of the person’s priorities?
Reality shows are here to stay. I guess, we will continue to see more and more celebrity crazy people trying to compete in them for their 2 mins of fame. Are we getting shallow as a society or is it just the opportunities that have opened up avenues to show case such people. Reality shows that are some kind of talent show/hunts certainly do open up avenues to the talented – but when reality shows are just entertainment, and the standards constantly dropping to further sensationalize it – where will all this end?
Another book review, I am afraid. I can’t even promise that this is the last. So all of you who will groan or ask me if Smita’s ghost has entered me – I can’t help it 
Just had to review this.
By Anne Cherian
This is another book that I picked on a whim. I end up picking up books by authors of South Asian origin these days. To add to that Anne Cherian was brought in Jamshedpur. So being my compatriot – I just had to read her.
Funnily, I read two books with set in Tamilian Brahmin environments and I would whole-heartedly agree with OG in his comment on my previous post about stereotypes. This book was full of it. An orthodox family, where girls are not even allowed to talk to boys. Brought up in secluded environment where all the girls do is get ready to get married. Mother who is constantly worried about the dowry and funnily fathers that are hardly ever mentioned. The obsession with the white skin color.
Suneel(Neel) is an NRI who is in a great big hurry to merge into the American society. He intends to make up for his skin colour by marrying a bonafide American woman who can help speed up his entry into American society. Unfortunately for him, that just does not seem to be happening. On a visit to his hometown, he is manipulated to get married to Leila, a 30 year old woman, who was on the verge of being confined to the shelf, thanks to her height.
The story is quite predictable, though well written. The location of their hometown, in India, was quite confusing, not that it matters, really. From the initial pages, it sounds like it is a total Tamilian environment, then there is a mention that it is 5 hours away from Bombay, and then again about it being a steel town. So till the end I was not quite sure where it was located. Despite all the clichés and the totally expected ending, it still managed to keep it’s tempo and kept my interest till the end.
I would not call it a great read, but it is still a decent read, if you can ignore all the stereotypes and clichés . Not too great , not too bad.
Next Review - The Italian Wedding.
by Ameen Merchant
It was difficult for me to believe that this book was written by a man. Not that I am trying to be sexist or anything, it is just that the way the characters are built up and the way they act, given the fact that the two main characters are women, it was very intuitive. It was a wonderful read, even more so for a first book.
It is a moving tale of two sisters growing up in an ultra- orthodox Tamilian Brahmin family in an agraharam. The elder sister is made to give up school and take up household responsibilities when their mother dies in a road accident. The trials that follow, unpleasant truths being exposed, the various relationships that are built and destroyed and the music which is part of the destiny of one of the sisters. The book also has the proper Tamilian flavour, with all the Tamil words that are liberally sprinkled in conversations. Some of the conversations took me back to my music class days with a maami.
The only thing that kind detracted from the book for me was the ending. It lacked something. All in all, it was a good read. It kept my attention all through and I could empathize with the characters.
The last few days, the site that I have been haunting is rightmove.co.uk. I almost send a silent prayer everytime I refresh the page.
You see, we are house-hunting. The landlord of the house we are staying at, had put his house on sale. We had been quite sure that the house would not get sold all that soon, given the economy and everything. The agent had also assured us that sales do tend to take their time. But then, little did we know that that’s not how it works when we are the tenants. In our case, the house got sold almost immediately. I should have heeded husband’s advice of keeping the house shoddy and turning off prospective buyers
Anyways, since I did not (listen to worthy advice, ie), it is up to me to find us a home before we get kicked out. Not that I mind – I happen to love looking at houses. Husband claims that it is my ‘hobby’ looking at houses, their floor plans, the decor and stuff like that.Then again, looking in desperation is not fun at all.
I had started the search in the area that we live. It is a really nice residential area with plenty of green space and a lovely playground, with great schools nearby and Poohi has friends nearby – all reasons to stay as close to where we are. Fate, however has other plans – not a single house up for rent anywhere nearby.
So in vain I widen my search in a desperate attempt to find a suitable house. The houses I find , I can’t even begin to describe. Some houses look like they have never seen a vacuum cleaner in their lives, some have cubby holes for rooms. One house, I was not even able to view, the tenant went missing when we landed there. I was not really upset, the outside was scary enough for me.
You see, I have this strict methodology that I follow while looking for houses.
1. No show, no go – No picture in the advertisement, I will not take a second look at the property. I have realised after years of house hunting that if they have not posted pictures, there is a reason for it.
2. Get the postcode and check the surrounding area. Some times the most beautiful houses are in really seedy areas – and I don’t want my daughter playing with children with vocabulary sprinkled with colourful words, Thank you very much.
3. The schools that we have applied for Poohi for next year are close by.
4. Any house that has been on the market for more than 2 weeks – no point looking at it.
Apart from all this of course, the size and parking etc, etc matters. Now after all this filtering, how do I still end up at houses which look marvellous in the pictures only to look like vandalised houses in reality? The pictures were a decade old !
Or better still the grass in the garden is so overgrown that there might be wildlife in there.
Grass that looks cleaner than the carpets inside.
Rooms which make my cubicle at work look spacious.
Storage space? What’s that again ?
How can there be houses without a washer-dryer in this part of the world where it rains most of the time?
One real estate agent actually told me to try to imagine the house without the dirt!
The ultimate disappointment was this morning, when I actually managed to find a house which looked perfect – at least in the pics, had everything we wanted, but apparently the tenants decided not to move out. I have a feeling that they checked the market and decided to stay put. Back to square one. Back to praying and refreshing and hoping against hope that I will find my perfect house, before we get homeless.
Last week, when I went to my neighbourhood library, I was in for a huge surprise. There was a huge selection of new stock lined up and there were some books that I had been dying to read.
I picked up 19 books, out of which three were Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni books. It is really no exaggeration to say that my joy knew no bounds. I had so many on my list that I was delighted to get hold of these. So off I started on a CBD marathon starting off with The Palace of Illusions.
The Palace of Illusions
This was one book I had read a lot about and have to say, that I was not disappointed at all. The familiar story of Mahabharata narrated by Draupadi. The woman who nobody names their daughters after. The fiery woman, born from fire, with a mind of her own , in a time where it was not appreciated. Starting from her childhood where she is the unexpected, unwanted daughter till the end. It was refreshing to read the familiar story, which most of us have grown up with, from a woman’s perspective and that too, a woman who had a hand in the way it all turned out. Here we see her human side, how she overcame her own complexes, how she learnt to use people to her benefit. Her love of her brother, who she felt needed her support and help. How she even gave up her deepest desire in order to save his life, only to see him killed far more brutally later.
The title alludes to the Palace of Illusions which the Pandavas and Draupadi designed. Their joy and pride, which also in some ways ended up as their downfall. The presence of Krishna, who is by far, my favourite character in the Mahabharata, in almost every important part of her life. There is something about Krishna!
The most moving part was her feelings for Karna. Being married to five men and yet yearning for their arch-enemy( and elder brother, unknown to them). It made me wish that somehow the story ends happily, and they get to be with each other.
There was something about the way CBD narrates the story through Draupadi which captivated me throughout. Totally worth the read.
Queen of Dreams
Rakhi, a struggling artist and divorced single mother, is struggling to keep her living while bringing up her daughter in Berkeley. Her mother is a dream teller and growing up, all she wanted was to be just like her mother. Her father was a non-entity for her – all she could recall of him was of him singing Hindi movie songs.
It is after her mother’s death that she starts to understand her father. Just as she and her friend Belle were to lose their livelihood, that her father steps in, helps transform their nondescript Chai house into the International Kurma House. Rakhi’s self discovery continues as she struggles between trying to understand her mother, herself and her daughter. Her ex-husband’s familiarity with her parents and friends and daughter is also unsettling for her and she continues to resist all his efforts at a reconciliation.
Right in the middle of all this Sept 11 happens, bringing up new questions, new doubts for all of them. I think it also helped bring some clarity for Rakhi.
It was a fascinating read, more so because of the unique concept of dream telling. Rakhi’s mother’s struggle to keep a balance between her dream telling and her life with her daughter and husband, Rakhi’s struggle to understand her mother, the yearning, to be like her and to try and be a good mother to her daughter is brought out so beautifully. It just amazed me how CBD handled it all. For me, it was a fascinating read. I found it totally un-putdown-able.
Vine of Desire
This book, was not as captivating as her other books. It is supposed to take off where Sisters of My Heart – which I have not read. So I think I will probably write about this, after I read that as well. But as it was, it was not as good as her other books – that I have read. In some parts of the book, I find it difficult to understand why the characters behave the way they do.
All in all, I like the way she writes, she does manage to capture one’s imagination, most of the time. I think Sister of My Heart is the next book that I would like to read of hers. Though I think I have had my fill of stories of immigrants in America. I am now reading The Silent Raga – which I am thoroughly enjoying. A Good Indian Wife by Anne Cherian. I just picked it up on a whim – have any of you read it? Is it worth the read?
‘I really admire your way of thinking,’ said X as we were chatting, adding, ‘not like housewives normally think’.
And then she went on to explain how ‘normally’ women do not think like men and all this while trying to compliment me.
To say that I was gobsmacked would be an understatement. Does the way you think or the thinking process itself have anything to do with the fact that I am a housewife/homemaker. How does that make any difference?
It made me wonder about perceptions and prejudices. Do we judge and perceive people differently based on what they do? I had blogged about how I have seen people treat people differently based on different factors.
Does the fact that I am a homemaker, mean that my analytical skills or my thinking would be sub-standard ? Just by virtue of the fact that somebody is gainfully employed, does it make his/her thinking process in any way, superior? Obviously, the assumption is that because somebody is working, they are automatically more exposed to the world outside than a traditional homemaker who stays at home – but how true is it in today’s world? I know homemakers who are far more aware and educated than people with several degrees but no real education. People(both men and women), who despite having worked across countries are still so close minded that they could just be living in the neighborhood they grew up in.
It also makes me wonder how easily people attach labels and ’sort’ people with that. Surely every individual is multifaceted. What we do for a living is just one aspect of us. Some chose the career that they are in, some are forced into what they do by circumstances, but is it really an measure their capabilities? I mean, obviously some career choices do indicate abilities but does it automatically mean that others in other professions do not have the same capabilities? And more importantly, why is there such a big prejudice against homemakers? Don’t they have a very important role in the society?
The inherent prejudice just makes me wild. It makes me wilder when people who should know better make statements like this.
I consider myself one of the lucky ones.
Lucky that my school years have been some of the best times of my life. That I had teachers who I adored.
This video had been shared by one of my batch-mates on a social networking site. It says ‘memories of the 2007 batch’ – but surprisingly, it could have been mine. The school grounds, the classrooms, the library I used to haunt…, the annual days, even some of the teachers who taught me are there in the video. To say, that I choked on emotions would be an understatement. It has been 17 years since I graduated from this school – but it feels like yesterday.
Last I went there was in 2005. I was pregnant with daughter then and it was to be one of my last visits to Jamshedpur. Dad was to retire the next year and move to Kerala. I had pulled husband along to come and see one last glance of my school. He had been surprised to meet teachers who still enthusiastically remembered me – one of them even told him that I was a ‘gem’ Have to say, that made my day It had felt wonderful to see some of my old teachers, the place where I spent 15 years of my life.
Whoever made this video, did not just capture his memories – he gave me back some of mine – tucked away, almost forgotten memories. As I always say, I just hope that my daughter is equally lucky with her school and her teachers.
and help yourself to some banana bread
Don’t worry – it is a low fat one and I am so delighted with it that I have even had a slice for breakfast I am normally, never modify cake recipes unless others who have made the cake suggest modifications. This time, however, I took a chance and experiemented. You see, I was keeping away from baking after all the holiday weight I had put on. Yesterday however, in order to keep Poohi entertained, I made a rather rash promise that we would bake a cake – and she ensured that I did not break my promise- try as I might. So if I had to bake, I decided to bake something low-fat and guilt-free( or atleast less guilty). And here is the recipe in case any of you are interested. I got the recipe from here, but made the following modifications.
- 2 cups all purpose flour
- 3/4 tsp baking soda
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 3/4 cup sugar
- 1/4 cup vegetable oil
- 2 large eggs
- 3 large over-ripe bananas
- 1/3 cup plain fat-free yogurt
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
Preparation:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Spoon flour gently into measuring cups and level with a knife. Stir flour, baking soda and salt together in a medium bowl. Put aside. Place sugar and butter in a large bowl and beat at low speed with a mixer until well blended. Add one egg at a time and blend well after each one. Add in mashed banana, yogurt and vanilla extract, beat until blended. Add flour mixture and blend until just moist. Do not over-mix. Spray an 8 1/2 x 4 1/2-inch loaf pan with nonstick cooking spray. Pour batter into pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 60-70 minutes (until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean). Remove from pan after 10 minutes or so and cool on a wire rack.
I have to stop writing about the weather – but weather seems to be the most happening thing around here. The most clicked website on my laptop in the BBC weather page. The weather forecast for today was sleet and snow and icy roads – very treacherous and dangerous. For us, it just means that we stay put indoors today.
The biggest fallout is that going to school was out of question. The school was considerate enough to text us parents to let us know that they would ‘understand’ if our children were not to come to school today given the conditions outside. School closures were in the news last week with people alleging that schools were opting for the easy way out by closing schools. London Mayor Boris Johnson asked the education sector ‘to think twice before closing any schools in the event of further bad weather’ . Lots of parents seem to be upset by the closures too. For us, it was a quick decision not to send her to school – made easier by the fact that the school themselves had kept the nursery closed. From these reports, it just showed how important every day’s work is, for so many people even more so when they were single parents with no alternative options of child care to fall back on. For many, the only option was to brave the weather, take their children to school and then go to work.
On a lighter note, my biggest problem was keeping daughter entertained. Reading, playacting, painting – anything to keep her from being bored. School is so full of activities that the things we do at home is not half as fun – even less so, when we have stay indoors. These days , her favourite activity is pretending to be a princess and wearing a throw like a cape and walking around. It drives me nuts because the ‘cape’ ensures that all the cushions land up on the floor and the house looks like a hurricane passed through it I will be GLAD when school starts again.
A friend and I had been discussing about how our children love school so much. They don’t have any problems waking up for school. Poohi wakes up all excited about going to school. The only exception is when she is unwell. She wakes up with, ‘Is it morning yet? Time for school?’ One of the reasons I think children find it difficult to wake up on time is because they have not had their full sleep. Especially when they sleep late and have to wake up on time. I make it a point to ensure that Poohi’s bedtime is not delayed during weekdays. During weekends, once in a while it does get late, especially if we go over for dinner to friend’s places but never during school nights. A friend of mine was telling me how once she had guests over on a Sunday night and they did not leave until 2 in the morning. Her child was up all that time too – unable to sleep when there were guests around. How inconsiderate is that?
Oh dear, I just noticed that I have rambled on and on.. Just before signing off – what is your policy on the movies you would like your child to watch? I am extra careful and am very very very careful about what she watches. I am even very careful about what I read to her. I am not too fond of fairy tales where the princesses are waiting for Prince Charming to ‘rescue’ them. Call me crazy but I am not too comfortable with introducing such ideas into her head. I know parents who let their children(of Poohi’s age ) watch movies like Rang De Basanti and think that I am being over-protective. While RDB is a great movie – I still feel that it is not appropriate for my daughter’s age. What would be your take?
